Sunday, February 24, 2013

My Modeling Dilemma

Since sophomore year, I've had a lot of people suggest modeling to me since I'm your typical tall, slender girl. When the idea was new to me I would just deny whatever anybody told me because I didn't think I was exactly modeling material.

Those girls you see walking down the runway are flawless (Regina George flawless, I hear her hair is insured for $10,000) and I wasn't exactly comfortable in my own skin. In the summer between freshman and sophomore year I was sick of being undermined from other girls because I wasn't as pretty, as outgoing or as confident. So I got a new look, chopped off my long hair to my shoulders, learned the basics or makeup, used my savings to buy a new wardrobe and I made a vow to myself to be outgoing and meet new people for the new school year.


I'm now that concept called confident and 5.9, 119 lbs, a 25 in.waist and perfectly content as myself. I finally decided to go for it and begin the introduction process with agencies. My first meeting with an agency was last Monday.
After a little intell on the agency I was able to interview with the director. I anticipated some critics but let me tell you, this guy was hypercritical. Basically, he told me I need whiter teeth, a clearer face, I need to dye my hair to one solid color and to make it big my proportions are one inch too big (Preferable a 10 in. difference: 24 in. waist x 34 in. hip when I have a 25 in. waist x 35 in. hip). According to them, I'm 5.8 so I also barely make the height requirements. I'm just thinking to myself, "Okay, it's not like I get my height measured at a cardiology office every three months verifying I'm 5.9 1/2."

He was so incredibly nit picky but nothing he said pissed me off more than when he told me to "cover that up" pertaining to my scar. Reality check,  it's just dead skin cells not an alien probe bulging out of my chest. By the end of the interview, I was ready to crawl in my bed, hide under the covers and cry.

I get it, these are not your standards or your perception on acceptable exposure; it's the clients. However, a scar represents disposition, originality and tells a story, especially a sublimity scar like mine. By telling me to cover up my scar is like telling me to put a paper bag over my head which is pretty much how I feel after individually listing each insecurity of mine.

After that little adventure, my idea of modeling was completely intercepted and I was doubting whether I still wanted to become one if I was just going to be downgraded from here on and not be accepted as something beautiful due to my more unique qualities. Although, I think someone like me as a model would be even more of an accomplishment because I'm not just another flawless face, perfect body clone. I have an oddity that no one else in the industry has because it was disregarded as a flaw and as a whole labeled as flawed. I see my scar as an advantage because I can offer something daring and new. For example, you flip through a magazine and all you see are beautiful, skinny girls and that's all their characterized as. I don't want to be characterized, I want to be a character. Something people will look at and not feel below standards next to this nonexistent beauty. I want to be a model for one purpose; to show people like me that they have a chance in this twisted industry.

My dilemma being, many agencies are like the one I visited so not only will it be difficult just to sign a contract but it will be even more difficult to be offered modeling jobs. I'm not going to give up only after one demeaning agency but after going through all in state agencies, maybe my fate is just to be a med student and so on and so forth from there.

Probably should start on that homework I've been procrastinating on, till next time peaches!

Friday, February 15, 2013

Happy Heart Month!

As everyone knows, February is mostly known for Heart Disease Awareness month. Not Valentine's Day/ Single Awareness Day/ Arizona's Birthday/ Oregon's Birthday whatsoever. More specifically between the 7th to the 14th in February is Congenital Heart Disease week. I wish people were more aware of Congenital Heart Disease and how much it affects us. I'm not disrespecting cancer, because there's no doubt it's an awful, life threatening disease, but I wish the social media put just as much effort to publicizing heart disease than it does to cancer. I'm just saying, when do you ever see commercials or advertisement's raising awareness, stating the facts or broadcasting successful life stories for heart disease or perhaps cystic fibrosis or maybe Alzheimer's. Everyone can agree their all terrible diseases but no one knows the facts. It's like unconsciously leaving us in the dark. So, in honor of CHD week here is the seven day's of CHD Facts:

  • Congenital Heart Defects are common and deadly, yet CHD research is grossly under-funded relative to the prevalence of the disease. 
  • There are NO cure for any of the congenital heart defects. Only "repairs".
  • More than 50% of all children born with CHD will require at least 1 invasive surgery in their lifetime.
  • In most cases, scientists do not know what causes the heart to have a defect.
  • There is no limit to how many defects a patient can have been born with.
  • CHD is the #1 birth defect and kills more people than all of childhood cancers combined.
  • Each year over 1,000,000 babies are born worldwide with congenital heart defect. 100,000 of them will not live to see their first birthday.
(credits to Becca, give her some love and check out her blog:

Also, because red is the color of Heart Month, I decided to wear red everyday during Congenital Heart Disease week. Being the narcissist I am, I also took pictures everyday (or at least when I remembered) for proof.
Flamin Red Lips
How could one be told to go to school when it's so beautiful outside?
Red Hipster glasses
Chilling in my glad rags :)
Valentine's Day/ Single Awareness Day/ biggest high school popularity contest
Aristotle once said, "Equality consists of the same treatment of similar persons" We're all different thanks to reproduction and each individuals genetic stem but we are all human. We're all apart of this society making us all equal. No one is less important, more significant, matters or favored more. Whether through our words, our acts or our cures; we all deserve to be treated the same.

Don't leave us in the dark, spread the word and raise awareness! Until next time, Happy Heart Month peaches!